Have you been Sir'd?

By Joanna Jones

Being called, "sir" can be very disappointing when you are all dressed up as a girl. It happens to me here and there. Perhaps 2-3 times per year. Most of the time I just blow it off. Usually, it is done by mistake from someone not paying attention. Sometimes it is on purpose. There are people who will say this as an insult. It stings. It hurts. It is humiliating.

Several years ago was a big shopping day for me at the mall for Christmas. I had planned to stay there for at least two hours. This time of the year my wife and I are buying clothes for each other. But the twist is we are buying dresses for both of us to "share wear". So choosing out dresses is harder and at the same time fun. It can take all day at the mall to try and pick out the ones that will work for the both of us. That's the fun part of our Christmas giving. Shop till you drop. Girls love that. Since I try to emulate a female I guess it runs in my veins too to shop until the blisters in my feet say to stop.

Well the only time left before Christmas for me was Sunday. The first store was great. Sales lady suggested a few dresses for me. Commented how curvy my body was. She asked another sales co-worker if she knew if they had this dress in large size for "her".

Next store was Macy's. We needed another contouring cream in the cosmetics department. After getting the product, I went to stand in a short line in front of the registers. There were a few being used. Off to the side of me about 20 feet away a sales clerk asked me where everyone in the area could hear him, "Sir, are you ready to check out". Then next came "Sir, you can come over here and I will ring you up." Finally, he said, "let's move down to the next register sir, this one is being rung up with another customer. "Each time he used the word sir I just wanted to collapse in pain. Since I was mostly surrounded by women, it really humiliated me to no end. As we walk down to the open register together, the sales guy mentioned that he had not seen me for awhile. He did this in a very nice way. Only then did I realize that this was the same guy that has rung me up at least 3 times over the last year. Nothing ever happened like this before with him. But it was not so crowded like it was so close to the holidays. I don't ever recall him addressing me as sir before. But he probably did not have to say anything because I am usually the only person at the register in the past.

So, after I got my package, the plan was to go shopping in the dress department at this store. As I was walking over to the section I was just too overwhelmed by the total embarrassment that had taken place. I was starting to tear up. In fact, I really felt like going into the corner and bawling. That's the girl inside me doing this.

After a minute or so I turned around and headed back to the cosmetic counter to take this guy to the side and explain that what he did was totally inappropriate. I am pretty sure he meant no harm. But you would think after working so long in this department that he has seen his share of cross-dressers buying cosmetics. I mean really. He should know better. You simply do not call out cross-dressers for all to hear. That makes everyone turn around to see what guy is in cosmetics buying stuff.

Unfortunately, when I got over to his section he was very busy with ringing up other customers. So I left the store. In fact, I was so distraught at the whole affair I left the mall with just 10% of the things I was going to buy for my wife for Christmas. Just walking to the far end of the mall, I was so self-conscious of what people might be thinking about when they saw me in the mall.

I can wear the most outrageous stuff in malls and it never bothers me with what other people may think. Remember, if you are all dressed up and you carry yourself just right, people will accept you as a guy dressing like a girl. I always get compliments from all the girls. And a few guys too. If, however, you somehow lose the ability to mentally create that aura then people near you can feel and see your uneasiness. Hence, the reason why my shopping trip was destroyed because of one sales clerk who does not have the foggiest idea how to address us girls properly.

So, if anyone that is reading this and is not a cross dresser, there are proper rules. If we are dressed completely like girls please refer to us just like women. There are many times when mistakes happen which is no big deal. Like when we have to open our mouths and speak. Usually, we sound just like other guys. People will automatically refer to us as sir or such. You just let it pass. But under no circumstances call out someone in a loud voice with "sir" without thinking what impact that may have on the cross-dresser. You never know. It could be one of us out shopping for a very special day. Like Christmas.

I spend 2.5 hours getting ready when I leave the house as Joanna. I try to get everything down just right. Unfortunately, I do not pass 100% like some of the great looking girls. My height of 6 feet does not help. Plus my facial features are kind of hard to cover up. But with all that effort I do expect people to treat me right. And 99.9% of the time people wherever I go are fantastic with me.